The Gift that Won’t Be Wrapped (A Note for My Kids)

This simple holiday letter reminds my kids what matters to them and to me this holiday season.

Dear Kids,

I know you’ll be happy this Christmas. The lights and the gifts and the family fun. You’ll love it. Probably. Mostly. I mean, you’ll enjoy parts of it.

Because here’s the thing: I know you’ll be disappointed, too.

Not in a rude, disrespectful way, but in a quiet, deep in your heart way when you realize you’ll never get everything you ever wanted. I can’t do that for you. And the truth is, no one can.

I didn’t give you everything you ever wanted for Christmas. But it goes far beyond that.

There were so many times at the store that I said no and we left in tears. So many things your friends have that I didn’t give you. There were so many things that we missed out on, events we didn’t go to, parties we declined. It was all for a reason.

I knew that no shiny pile of gifts or five-star vacation would ever fill the endless want deep inside. Don’t feel bad about that, we all have it. There is only one thing that can fill that in you, in me, in any of us, and that’s God.

So, I gave up the stockpiling of gifts.

I’ll still find things perfectly you. Sometimes I’ll get it right and sometimes it will become a funny family story. Sometimes it will end up in the back of your closet until years later. But there is one thing I’m trying desperately to give you that I just cannot wrap.

More than anything I want to give you time.

Time to be a kid.

Time with me.

Time to be bored.

Time to explore.

Time to feel like the star and time to feel your failure.

Time to feel love and time to feel sadness.

As you unwrap your gifts and we sit in a sea of torn wrapping and new things, you may have a moment where you feel disappointed. You may even feel a little sad that it’s over, like it’s a let-down.

Give yourself that moment and then find the next moment.

A moment to enjoy, a moment to rest, a moment to snuggle or laugh or just do something else. I cannot give you everything, but I can point you what your heart really longs for and I can give you love and the gift of time.

I love you.

Mom