Sometimes I’m not sure what to pray.
I know there are words I can say, things I can tell God or ask Him, but nothing seems quite right. Instead of praying anyway I’ve been quiet, closing off the communication between me and God because it doesn’t feel quite right.
In all honesty, I should know better. And that is the part that kills me.
I know I can tell God anything.
I know I can be still and just listen to Him.
I know my feelings can’t always be trusted.
But sometimes the things we know don’t line up with what we do. So, I spend days quiet, never really connecting with the very person that will always listen, always be there, and always love me.
Maybe it’s the always that is the problem. It’s easy to take God for granted when we know in our head that He’ll always be there for us.
This isn’t something I’m proud of, but I’m telling you in case I’m not the only one. In case you, too, have just stopped talking to Him. In case you wish things were different.
And as I tell you this I feel that tugging, a gentle reminder from those Sunday-school-days, telling me: Just tell Him. It’s okay. He’s listening.
Yet, somehow opening my lips feels like stepping off a cliff simply because it’s been so long since I’ve just talked to Him for real. I miss it. And a part of me dares to believe He does, too.
Honestly, I could open my lips and fill the void of air and space with words, talking at God instead of really talking with Him. But I don’t want to do that anymore.
Just tell Him. It’s okay. He’s listening. Share on XInstead, in that quiet space of unknown, I whisper one simple word: Jesus. I whisper over and over praying that the essence of His name would fill the empty until I feel it in my bones. Because these bones are dry and they need life that only His name can bring.
And I exhale His name and inhale the silence until I begin to feel something stir. Even then I keep exhaling and inhaling, trusting that this is enough. That He is enough. That He makes me enough.
What do you do when prayer feels hard?
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Rebecca,
Please know that you are NOT alone! Sometimes, when I’ve been praying for something for a long time (years), I can become sparse with my prayers. I take God for granted as well…after all He’ll still be here tomorrow. Sometimes I’m short with Him…”God, you know my prayer.” Some days I’m just plain peeved that nothing has moved on the “answered prayer meter”. You are so right in that I can take EVERYTHING, even my frustration, to Him in prayers. Praying simply the name of Jesus is often a “go-to” for me when I just can’t string the words together. God understands this prayer as well. Great thought-provoking post.
Blessings,
Bev xx
Isn’t it amazing how He understands and takes it all. What a loving God to take everything we give Him!
I have definitely experienced dryer times in my prayer life. “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus…..there’s something about that name. Master, Savior, Jesus, all Heaven and earth proclaim. Kings and Kingdoms will all pass away but there’s something about that name.” this made me think of this old time hymn!
Yes! I love how powerful His name is!
I identify with that feeling of stepping off the edge of a cliff, but for me, right now in this season, it’s really a problem of concentration. I have to keep yanking my brain back into conversation and fight the temptation toward condemnation with the realization that God is patient with my wool-gathering and he lives outside of time. Too,those apparent lapses in focus can just be folded into the conversation with God because he cares about everything that’s in my head and in my life.
I used to get frustrated with myself when I “got off track” in prayer. But then I realized my life is a prayer. God wants to be present in every part of my life. So I just keep talking!
“Because these bones are dry and they need life that only His name can bring.” The one word prayer, “Jesus”, has been whispered by my lips more than any other prayer. I have no words to adequately express how grateful I am for the peace and comfort which comes immediately.
Isn’t it amazing?! I love the power of His name.
You’re not the only one, prayer can feel very hard. I use Scripture in breath prayers when I cannot find words of my own. Breath prayers always draw my heart to the Lover of my soul and soon the words come. Thanks so much for sharing!
Breath prayers are amazing. There is so much relief and release that comes in our breath.
The Psalms completely transformed my prayer life. In the hardest season of my life, when I had cried till the tears ran out and the pain was so deep I didn’t even want to pray about it anymore, I turned to the Psalms. I was so encouraged because I realized God included in Scripture passages that expressed the darkest of human emotion. The Psalmist’s words reflected my own in surprising ways. For months, my prayers were literally reading the Psalms and basically saying, “God, this is my prayer today. This is my heart.”
I love that! I find the Psalms to be such a gift to my humanity.
This reminds me of the song “I Must Tell Jesus”–I’m so glad his name holds power in our lives and can change our longings and attitudes.
I haven’t heard that song! I’ll have to check it out!
I lean a lot on the Holy Spirit’s role to speak in groanings I cannot comprehend. laurensparks.net
YES! I love this. And so often I think it’s my job to fill the space. But the Holy Spirit intercedes on my behalf!
Thanks, Rebecca! I’ve always enjoyed your take on real faith in real life. Thanks for keeping it real. 🙂 I have those moments, too. Remembering that God is always there with welcoming arms helps me to open up when prayer is hard, even if it’s a little at a time.
Isn’t it amazing how He meets us wherever we are with whatever we offer?!
I know all the things you say you know but still sometimes prayer is hard. Sometimes it’s hard to hear God’s soft whisper or even His thundering voice. It’s hard to know what to say when, in reality, the ‘right’ words don’t matter. There are no right or wrong words. Needed to know I am not alone. So glad something…someONE led me the Gathering of Friends link-up and your post.
P.S. YOU write beautifully. When does your Bible study, your workbook, your daily devotional come out?
Your words, “the essence of His name would fill the empty” really spoke to me, because when I was a kid, I would hear my granny whisper, “Jesus,” all night long. I would think, “why doesn’t she say anything else? Seems like He’d get tired of just hearing His name over and over.” Perhaps she was doing what you said, filling the empty with His name.
I know one thing: just mentioning His name DOES comfort!
What a beautiful memory of your granny. She left you quite a legacy in that simple word!
That God for the Holy Spirit who prays for us, who goes to the father with our utterings that don’t make sense. But He makes sense of it!
THanks for coming by the Legacy Link-up!
YES!!! Amen to this my friend. Amen!
I get this Rebecca, though I have learnt over the years to be Contemplative which I shared in https://teawithjennifer.blog/2019/09/06/meditative/
& you may find interesting.
This has taken away that feeling… 😀
Blessings,
Jennifer
Thanks for sharing!
What a trap we fall into, hey? For me, the last month has been crazy busy. I do my Bible study most days, but the prayer gets pushed by the side because of ‘everything that needs to get done’. Then God so gently pushes me into ‘forced’ prayer – with friends and family;). He gently reminds me of how much He longs to spend time with me. He does that in many ways, including blog posts…
He’s pretty funny, isn’t He?! I’m so glad He always brings us back to Him and that He never gives up on us!
Rebecca, I love this post so much. I was just telling a family member who is going through a hard time, that God sees our broken hearts. He hears our anguish even if we can’t say it out loud. When your heartache is so bad that you cant pray, keep Jesus on the tip of your tongue. There is power in His Name, and he knows our need. Just keep whispering “Jesus” “Jesus” “Jesus”
Thanks for stopping by and linking up with us at the #GatheringofFriendsLinkParty 7. sharing
YES! Isn’t it amazing what power His name brings?!
Yes! Keep whispering His name! Great advice!
Rebecca, it’s so refreshing for you to share your real and raw emotions and from your heart in these articles. And much of this is fresh insight like this; “It’s easy to take God for granted when we know in our head that He’ll always be there for us.” Truth! Thank you!
So glad we can keep encouraging one another and others along the way!
I read this again and loved it so much. I think, right now, everyone can relate.
Jesus! The mention of His name is enough.
Amen, girl! Amen!